sin is a choice
by rainbowcoloredteardrops
Summary: Partly AU. Sets somewhat at the beginning of season 5, Katherine is human, took the cure and is dying. She leaves for Europe in an attempt to escape her enemies and spend her last months in peace only to meet a young girl by who's life story she finds herself incredibly touched. Rated M for graphic violence & strong language.
1. Chapter 1

Hey guys! I know I should update Stripped. Truth is I have no idea for the next chapter what so ever and I don't know when I'll be able to update it. However, I had another idea. This is going to be a little different, much darker, more angst, more death.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own the character Katherine Pierce, I just love to use her for my own pleasure ( no that didn't sound perverted at all).

ALSO: not in this chapter but it will happen sooner or later so I'll give you the warning now: triggers ahead. This will be dealing with death, drug abuse, alcohol abuse, depression and suicide. And it will have some pretty graphic violence and strong language. So if you have a problem with any of that please stop reading now (:

However if you do not, then please, take a seat and enjoy the show!

(also if you don't know me note that English is not my native tongue so I'm super sorry if there are any mistakes)

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prologue

I will never forget the night my mum passed away.

November the 23rd, 2012.

It had been one of those nights were the wind was howling through every corner of the streets, sneaking past the barrier of your clothes until the cold was practically crawling up your spine. I remember running like a mad person and how I nearly got hit by a car when I ignored the third red light.

How I arrived at the hospital gasping for air but nevertheless storming through the silent hallways until I had reached the right floor. Finally I was standing in front of her door, reaching for the door knob, when it swung open and a doctor with a face as pale as the wall behind him appeared in front of me. And the look he gave me told me everything I didn't want to know.

I caught a glance of the room behind him, of the view he tried to shield from my eyes.

And when I saw the white sheet that covered her body, I started to scream.

The following days were kind of a blur. Dozens of people came by to tell me how sorry they were and that they would always be there for me, that if I needed any help I shouldn't hesitate to call. I never did. Until the day of the funeral I did nothing but sit in mum's favorite chair, staring at the door for hours, waiting for her to come home and tell me how awesome her day at work had been. The door opened a few times, but it was never her who entered. My mum's best friend came by every few hours to check if I was still breathing and occasionally to force feed me. But that was it.

The day of the funeral I got up at six and started doing my nails, my hair and makeup. I grabbed the black dress I had already worn to three other burials, got into my heels and waited for someone to pick me up.

I have literally no memory of the actual funeral. Afterwards people told me that I didn't need to be this strong and that it was okay for me to let go and cry. I didn't. I kept it together until the first night alone at home after her grave had been sealed.

The feeling of crying so hysterically that your sobbing makes you throw up on the floor of the kitchen is not a very pleasant one.

After ten days I decided that everything was better than staying in that horribly empty and lifeless apartment for another night.

When I arrived at the bar it was so loud that I couldn't even seem to hear my own thoughts anymore which was just what I needed. Drowning out the noise of my own thinking was pleasant.

The look on my face must have reflected my emotional status way too well, since the barkeeper didn't even bother to ask for my ID.

Unfortunately, someone else had the guts to do that.

"Little dove, you look well too young for that tequilla."

My eyes instantly began to search for the source of sound.

I found her standing right next to me, wearing the most cocky look I had ever seen on the face of an actual human being. I have to admit that I forgot to breath for a slight moment as my brain realized what incredible beauty the woman in front of me wore as casually as it was a fucking jumpsuit.

Luckily I may have lost my mother but not my attitude.

"And you look like you're going to get on my nerves in about five seconds, so why don't you take your ass somewhere your opinion is asked for?"

Giving her the sweetest fake smile I could manage I reached for my shotglass and drowned the liquid in one swift move.

"Wooo, the little one's got temper. Who would have thought?"

"Oh fuck off."

I swear to god, I didn't even have time to regret what I just said.

That annoying little bitch may have looked like she was a lost Victoria's Secret Angel, but the grip she had around my throat gave more the impression of a very upset Hulk.

Basic human instincts kicked in and I felt adrenalin rushing through my veins, blood pumping faster.

Still, I didn't even blink. I just held her gaze and forced myself to a self reluctant smile. She had the most intense eyes I had ever seen. Dark brown that nearly seemed to blend in with her dilated pupils, shaped like those of a doe. The color went perfectly with the shades of chestnut her curls reflected.

"Go ahead. Push a little harder and you'll break my voice box. The shards will probably pierce through my windpipe and you can watch me choke on my own blood. Sounds like fun doesn't it?"

Even I noticed how the tone of my voice changed slightly. It was shaky and some of my previous confidence seemed to fade parallel to the amount of oxygen in my brain.

"Come on. Do it. I don't care."

Something in her eyes changed so fast that I nearly didn't see her expression shift. They weren't dark anymore. They were a soft brown with a hint of caramel. And they reflected... Understanding?

She let go of me so abruptly as if my skin had suddenly turned into acid. Shifting her head to the side, she mustered me like a piece of art she couldn't quite get a hold of. But as soon as that expression appeared, it faded and nothing but darkness was left in the depths of her eyes.

"I have to leave."

Her voice was more of a murmur than anything else and her body tensed as she turned around and started to leave. She probably would have. If something in my mind didn't tell me to grab her wrist.

The expression her face mirrored was priceless. A mixture of pure shock and astonishment about the fact that someone who she nearly just killed had the bowels to touch her like this.

"Tell me your name."

For a brief second she hesitated, before her gaze met mine once more.

"Katherine."

And with that, she turned on her heels and was out of the door.


	2. manners

hey guys, so here is the first real chapter. TW: abuse and violence.

enjoy!

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London would be a really beautiful place if the weather wouldn't suck this much.

Christmas was just around the corner and the stench of cinnamon, baked apples and pine needles wouldn't leave my nostrils. The 24th of December had always been a dreadful day for me, but now that my mum was gone I felt a strong desire to chop up every tree that had been adorned with baubles.

It's funny how you somehow expect the world to stop just for a little while, so you can recover from what you've just been through. It's completely irrational but you can't help yourself. And as soon as you step out of your door and see all those happy families with their little children who carry their cute little backpacks like they're on some kind of mission for Santa, you find yourself prepared to screamingly hold their own happiness against them only because you don't seem to be able to find any of it lately.

Right now I was on my way to the bar, which had evolved to my favorite place on this planet. Nobody was asking questions and nobody told me to be responsible while I ordered my 10th glass. It was a beautiful little paradise where I was safe from my own thoughts.

Although I seemed to find a little peace in them sometimes, but only if I stopped thinking about my life in general and started to remember those dark, big, beautiful eyes framed by eyelashes that were either fake or just plainly unfair.

Katherine. The sound of her voice still echoed in my ears at night, shortly before I started to drift away to sleep. I didn't know why, but something about her calmed my nerves better than any sort of liquor ever could. Not because I knew her, or trusted her by any means but that look in her eyes as they had become soft and gentle that night, made a small part of the pain go away.

Unfortunately, I mostly woke up sober the next morning and remembered that the chances of ever seeing her again in my entire life were virtually zero.

Being pretty caught up in a discussion with myself over how many shots it would take me to die of alcohol poisoning, I didn't notice that I was walking way too far. I've had taken two turns too many and suddenly I found myself standing in a pretty dark and to be honest, pretty creepy alley.

Tilting my head back to figure out why it got so dark I realized how high the buildings around me were. And a few seconds later I realized that I had absolutely no idea where I was.

"Bloody hell.", I murmured as the first snowflake landed on my nose. It wasn't enough that I had gotten lost in my own hometown now it fucking had to start snowing.

Deciding that trying to find my way back would work best if I started walking into the direction I just came from, I let out a frustrated sigh and tightened my coat.

Since some higher being decided that my day wasn't shitty enough just yet, a group of three men had just appeared out of one of the buildings and they were heading straight towards me, laughing. The way they walked gave away how utterly wasted they were.

Fear started to creep up my spine. I was suddenly well aware of what their intentions might be. That I was alone and had no way whatsoever to defend myself if they wanted to harm me. I always told myself that I wouldn't mind dying, that it probably would be the best for everyone if I just disappeared.

But right now I started to shake like a leaf.

Keeping my head down I started to walk into the direction they came from, trailing a little bit to the side only to realize that these guys were mirroring my moves.

Fear was replaced my pure panic as one of them raised his voice.

"Hey beautiful! Wan... Wanna hang out at mey place?"

I took a huge gulp and tried to swallow my fear. Without any success.

"Thank you for the invitation but I'm already awaited somewhere else. Now if you would please excuse me..."

His eyes were now filled with something I can only describe as the pure essence of wrath. With a speed I never thought a person that smelled so much like cheap vodka could posess, he grabbed my wrists and pushed me against the nearest wall.

I couldn't help but let out a scream and he pushed even harder, holding my hands together tightly just above my head.

"You need to calm yaself. Ma friends and I are only trying to have a good time."

"Yeah and you really need to take a shower, man."

Whether sarcasm was advisable in this situation was open for discussion but like so often my mouth reacted faster than my brain.

The guy that was holding me didn't seem to appreciate my concern for his personal hygiene, since his eyes grew even darker and the disgusting grin on his face even broader, revealing a row of yellow teeth.

"Lemme check how long you're going to keep that attitude up, little lady."

With that, one of his filthy, sweaty palms slid under my coat, groping one of my breasts through the thin fabric of my shirt. Now I started to really freak out. Fear wasn't even close to what went through my mind right now. My former scream turned into a weak whimper as I felt him squeeze with way too much pressure.

"Leave me alone you pathetic little moron!", I squeaked, starting to struggle with more force.

But he was taller not only by one, but two heads and built like a bull.

My feeble attempts to escape only resulted in laughter from him and his two pals.

"Shut up you little bitch."

I opened my mouth to throw the worst insults my vocabulary could serve with at him, but never got the chance to as he pushed his mouth against mine and started to kiss me.

Tears were forming in my eyes now, rolling down my cheeks and I closed them, partly out of shame, partly because I couldn't stand seeing and feeling what was happening to me at the same time. And as he started to part his lips, instincts took over and I bit down, hard.

He drew back immediately.

"Ouch! That fucking slut bit me!"

He was obviously awaiting a response from his friends but it had gone pretty quiet around us.

Too quiet.

I heard him swear silently and opened my eyes again, not quite processing the picture that offered itself in front of me.

A young woman with long, dark hair was standing next to him, holding a knife against his throat. Suddenly, he looked awfully pale.

"I'm pretty damn sure that your mother never got the chance to teach you any matters. First rule of being an ugly fucker as you are: Never touch anything you can't afford."

His face was showing complete and utter pain and only then I realized, that the knife she had against his throat was buried deep enough into his skin to draw blood.

A lot of blood. And with no sign of hesitation she took one swift move, sliding the blade across his skin, leaving it cut open and then letting go of him like he was nothing more than rag doll.

I saw the last flicker of hope leaving his eyes, still supporting his weight on his knees before he collapsed right in front of my feet. A pool of blood was forming around him, drenching his clothes.

The scene itself didn't scare me at all.

It scared me how much I enjoyed the view of him dying right before my eyes, the sound of the last ragged breath he took before he went silent.

It took me a while until I could avert my eyes from the corpse on the floor to look at my savior.

Part of me had known who she was all the time but the rational part of my brain didn't want to believe it. Now that I saw her face I had no chance but to believe.

It was Katherine.

"It's you."

Her neutral expression shifted into a slight smirk and she cocked her head a little to the side.

"Keep the thank you speech for later, little dove. Let's get you out of here, now. Before his friends recover from the massive hit on the head I gave them."

And without any further explanation she offered me her hand so I could step over the puddle of blood on the floor and told me the follow her.

I didn't even bother questioning anything anymore.

Not even the fact that I was willingly following a woman who just murdered a man in front of me.

She saved me. And right now, the only thing I was, was grateful.


End file.
